My Funny Valentines

This is a first for me—certainly a first on 14 February.

Sure, it's a mass valentine. But it's more. I got the idea after a brief setback in my life yesterday. Then I started making a list of women who have mattered in my life. This august group includes: friends, mates, crushes (many and varied), galpals, girlfriends, lovers (yikes!) and every scenario in between. This list comprises the only humanoids I've asked to view this incredible, gravitas-laden blog post.

We have shared titters, all-out laughter, stories, heartbreak, warmth—and sometimes tenderness, affection and love, in their many different guises. But one thread runs true throughout all of you Women of Substance: Every one of you has—in some way, shape or form—helped me. Pick your adverb: emotionally, financially, intimately, humorously, platonically.

At the onset of this idea, I thought I'd have a handful of gals with whom I wanted to share this. As I write, the total is 80+. And I'm not counting the few who have, sad to say, passed. Plus the ones with whom I've lost touch. Plus a new acquaintance whose location I have yet to track down. My detectives are on the case. Some I've known since childhood; others have only recently walked into my life.

You have been rocks, shoulders, dear hearts, ears, eyes and souls. I can easily pinpoint conversations, dates, drinks and fun with each of you. Some were just evanescent moments, jetting by quickly, but holding Alps of meaning.

What's the upshot? I'm a lucky guy. This exercise exists to thank you.

I hope that those of you with spouses, partners and significant others are cherished by your men, especially today. You are more than deserving. For every guy who fails his mate in this respect today: You are a colossal jerk.

For those you, like me, who are flying solo, I am with you, ready to deliver vicarious candy, flowers and hugs, as needed.

My apologies to those I may have omitted. To guys ready to bust my spheroids with man-card jokes, bugger off. This is between me and my women.

Of course, this is self-serving in that I am eliciting optional responses from all of you. Especially if you want to know why you are on this list. Private, chastely mushy emails can be sent to aceholleran@gmail.com  .

To each and every one of you ladies, as the song says, I wish you love.